All Posts

The New Loneliness and How Modern Life Leaves Us Emotionally Unseen Do you feel as though we are all becoming more isolated from one another? I have found myself thinking about this a great deal lately. How many of us now spend more time alone, more time behind screens, more time moving through lives that feel increasingly individualised, pressured, and emotionally self-contained. Entire days spent disappearing into laptops and phones. Conversations reduced to message threads

On race, rupture, and what it takes to stay when we get it wrong TL;DR: What does it mean to be implicated in harm while trying to do good? Ethical practice is not about getting it right, but about being willing to stay in uncomfortable relational space long enough to learn something real. As a therapist, I am constantly reflecting, learning, and adjusting. Not out of virtue, but because the work demands it. The world, the culture, and the politics surrounding us are shifting

A Gestalt perspective on polyamory, monogamy and the relational field. TL;DR We’ve built a model of love where one person is supposed to be our entire emotional world—it’s breaking under the pressure of modern life. Polyamory isn’t just about sex; for many, it’s an attempt to find honesty, connection, and more sustainable ways of relating. Expanding beyond the couple can redistribute intimacy and support but it also creates new tensions and demands. The real issue isn’t how

The Quiet Double Standard Around Women’s Boundaries TL;DR Women’s boundaries are often treated differently to men’s.When men say no, it’s seen as autonomy.When women say no, it’s more likely to be experienced as rejection — and sometimes punished. This isn’t just cultural. It’s relational.Boundaries don’t create problems. They reveal them. I’ve created a small quiz under this essay about working with “no.” Whether you’re the one setting a boundary, or the one hearing it, you

How Gestalt therapy explains why we became a culture of fakes — and what it actually takes to be real The Crisis Everyone Is Performing. Everyone Knows It. Kim Kardashian built a billion-dollar empire on the promise of total transparency — every argument, every breakdown, every unglamorous moment, broadcast. And yet in 2022 she told a journalist the secret to life is "getting up and working out." We watched her cry on camera for twenty years and still have no idea who she act

TL;DR? Under this essay I’ve created a checklist for couples to test whether you’re quiet quitting your relationship. Check it out. In November of last year, Monica Corcoran Harel wrote an insightful and thought-provoking essay in The Cut —one that exposed the phenomenon of women “checking out” of their marriages. I read compelling stories, studies, and convincing explanations for why women are deciding to “quiet quit” their marriages. But as a Gestalt therapist—one who works

My Complicated Relationship with The End. Sex and The City (2003) As the year winds down — that strange stretch of time where everything feels both too full and not quite finished — I’ve been thinking a lot about endings. Not the dramatic, cinematic ones, but the quiet, ordinary endings we avoid, postpone, or slip out of sideways. Maybe it’s the calendar turning over, or the collective instinct to “wrap things up,” but endings feel especially loud right now. The High of Hello

What a TikTok trend reveals about patriarchy, polarities and the mess of modern love. Maybe the embarrassing boyfriend trend isn’t about him at all. There’s been a lot of chatter online, debating on whether having a boyfriend is embarrassing now. I read the Chante Joseph’s viral piece in British Vogue that started it all and, as a therapist, I had some thoughts. It’s tempting to dismiss this as another silly internet fad. But field phenomena always tell a deeper story. Tre

Understanding and Coping with Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) Seasonal affective disorder As the days grow shorter and the nights stretch longer, many of us feel the shift. For some, it’s just a passing dip in energy. For others, it’s something more profound — a heaviness that settles in the body and mind. This can feel at odds with the season’s themes, especially as we come on to Christmas and the New Year. Right now, you can see influencers discussing their “winter arc,”